I love family. You know I really do. I wish to high heaven that I could be around them so much more than I am. There is a wedding happening in BC this August and I SOOOO want to be there. I could see my cousin get married AND I could see my sister and her husband's new home. It would be amazing...and I can't because, oh yeah, we don't have the money. Stupid money...I hate it and my lack of it...lol

Ehm...I'm gonna move on now. I'd go on and on about not blogging but really who am I apologising to. You see my laptop it's on the fritz and I'm used to typing on that when I blog AND when I write. With it gone and me having to use Jonathan's computer I am not into writing a whole lot. This keyboard is weird and the computer is slow...in short...not fun.

Wish me luck...

So I've finally seen the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie...'At World's End'...and if the end of the world contains the view at the end of the movie I'm ALL for the end of the world...lol That sparked a need to see the movie 'Haven' so my girls Krista and Jae and I watched 'Haven' and 'Ned Kelly' while our guys went golfing. It was fun...of course that was a few days ago

Uh now I'm looking at working 8 days in a row and turning 30 somewhere in there.

Life it weird, I wish I could articulate it properly.

...okay so it's quite muggy and hot...but I wanted to sound optimistic.

It is so bizarre there are days when I have SO very much to say and then other days when I am at a loss for words. And I know that those of you who know me are wondering how in the heck I can be at a loss for words...I'm telling you people...LOSS for words.

Today is sort of in between...I'm kind of at a loss...but I want to put a post up so I'm just gonna start typing and we'll see what happens...oh wow!

So I was reflecting on something today. I just found out that my cousin is getting married in August. This is fantastic news because I know her fiance and I love him an I know that he just fits perfectly into her family...the thing is she is the youngest and I'm wondering how it is affecting her older sister. I know how much my sister's engagement affected me.

It's weird in retrospect I wouldn't have changed a thing. I'm so very glad that I got to wait to find my guy...but since I'm allowed to look back in retrospect then I could sound like I'm talking out of my arse. But people I'm still so very familiar with that feeling. The one where I felt like I was pitted against myself. There was part of me, the part that was so 100% supportive of my sister that was SO thrilled that she was getting married. Then there was the part of me that was jealous...just plain jealous.

It has to be said that it was never because my sister stuffed it down my throat. If anything she was overtly concerned about me. I just watched her with this man and desperately wanted that...and since it was my sister it was harder to brush aside. I knew the Lord had a man planned for me...I just had always assumed it would be before my sister. I mean isn't that the rule...oldest to youngest? Instead my sister got married, my brother was in a long term relationship and I had...no one.

I don't know how my cousin is dealing with her younger sister getting engaged, but knowing her personality I'm sure it's bothering her. I guess my message, if she wanted to hear it, would be to hold out and focus on her sister's happiness instead of her own disappointment. It worked for me...an unless you've gone through it, it's hard to relate. It's a tumultuous time that's for sure.

SO that was my ramble...did it make sense? Probably not, but I'm bloggin' yo...so I'm trying! :)

...go me.

So it's my dad's birthday tomorrow...sure wish I could call him and wish him a happy birthday...maybe next year.

You ever have one of those days where so many things seem to go right and you just don't know what to do with it because everything usually goes wrong? And then you berate yourself for not being able to just sit and enjoy any and all joy that comes your way. I always want to take any good day and turn it around to pray for better. Something like:

"Thanks for the good you gave me today Lord...now would you be a dear and deal with the hella huge pink elephant problem in my family right now so I could really and truly enjoy the next good day you give me? Thanks...ps- good on ya for hookin' me up before I'm 30...little bit of a tight squeeze there don't you think?"

Ya okay you're not supposed to be sarcastic with a Deity...but I have it on good authority that God has a sense of humor...I mean come on people a platypus?? :p

I'm sorry it's after midnight, I'm still up and decided to ramble. I guess it's not dad's birthday tomorrow any more...it's his birthday today...happy birthday dad...know that I love you even if I can't tell you today.

So I'm sipping the product of my first free pound of coffee from Starbucks...so good!

Well I said that I would blog more, thus here is another installment...aren't you all happy? I have about half an hour before I go to work so I'm gonna give you an update. I have been working at Starbucks for three days now. So fun!! Honestly it's a blast. I mean there is a heck of a lot of things to learn. And let me tell you I don't think I've ever done as much reading for a job as this one. I spent most of my first two shifts (13 hours in total) reading about coffee. Honestly there's a binder under the front counter that gives details about each of our coffees.

I'm gonna be a coffee guru, therefore a coffee snob...lol In fact yesterday I did my first coffee tasting. Did you know that there is actual ways to taste coffee? You smell (put the cup up to your nose then cup your hand over your nose and the cup and sniff...describe the smell) you taste (slurp the coffee so that it splashes throughout your mouth covering your palate...describe the taste)...you can also tell boldness by how long the coffee flavour sits on your tongue. LoL

I tasted the Kenya blend, which I swear has a hint of a grapefruit flavour...jeesh and I thought coffee was the caffeine boost that woke you up in the morning. Not so folks...not so...lol

The people are fantastic, they are so easy to learn around and so nice. I actually look forward to going to work...how bizarre! Today I get to learn the coffee bar, which means I get to learn how to make the fun coffees. I've done fraps but not the hot drinks...I'm gonna be all learned...on Monday I learn drive thru...dun dun dun

So on that learning note I'm gonna get my butt fully ready to go to work...oooh as a final thought I went and bought some new clothes yesterday...for work...but it was still fun...anyway...I gotta jet, I'll try to be more entertaining in my next post. :p

That's what I'm doing right now...hanging my head...in shame. I have been told by reliable sources *mymom* that there are some who are a little upset with me for not blogging...again with the shame.

It's not all the way down the back because I don't have a shot of that yet, but hey you can see my hair with Krista's hair clip in it...cute huh. I was actually having a conversation with my mom and my sister-in-law Jenny about flipping the bird...it was highly entertaining...lol

Okay so we got good pics and then we got to the log cabin where the reception was being held and oh my goodness it was decorated so gorgeously. Joelle had basically got some family friends to do the decorating and they did a fantastic job, I was so very impressed.

We had a short ceremony that everyone seemed to love...it was great. My mom's side of the family was all there. My family from California was there! All my uncles on my mom's side were there so I did have some family representation. It wasn't complete I wish my whole family could have been there...but they will be in the THIRD reception which doesn't have a date yet...but when it does I expect to see all of you Ontario blog readers there...with flowers. ;) As well as the Wiebe fam that I missed...a lot...I'm really getting married all year aren't I?

AND I get to wear the dress again...in hotter weather...hopefully not as tight...lol I don't know how ANYONE wore a corset...seriously it was intense...on the plus side I am told I looked good...so that made part of the not being to take deep breaths worth it. :p

So this is my blog today...tomorrow I'm back to work. I'm starting at Starbucks and then working three hours at Fabutan...it should be a full day and after my relaxing honeymoon I'm looking forward to it. Barrier Bay was awesome and just what we needed. I did a lot of napping and sleeping...something I very much needed. PLUS I got to spend all kinds of time with my hubby...who is awesome. :)

I'm signing off now...cause if I don't post it now I won't post it...and I don't want to make anyone else sad. ;) Love you all!!