Okay I know I'm not even overdue yet but I don't care I'm so ready to have this baby! LoL My dad is already here and my mom will be coming in tonight so really there is nothing left for me to wait for. I figure tomorrow is a good time as any...LoL I know if I'm actually a week overdue I'm not gonna be a happy camper. At least right now I have my air conditioner to make life a bit better in the apartment...although tomorrow I'm gonna start walking with my mom, as much as possible. :p

And since I haven't ranted much in the last few weeks...okay I rant all the time...but really this is a rant that I sort of started putting together in my head the other night when I couldn't sleep. I am so ready for this...not giving birth or the labour (although I'm ready for that too) the whole being a mom thing. What's funny is, that doesn't seem to placate those who would want to 'warn' me about what I'm in for...some don't know me that well and aren't aware of how old I am. Other's think they are helping when really it's patronizing (but then again it's me, I feel patronized a lot sooner than most).

I am aware that I have given up my body as it once was forever. I had that body for 30 years I'm okay giving it up and frankly more people were obsessed with my body than me...in the long run it's not a loss to me and worth giving up for my child. I also know that I won't ever have the same sleep pattern again. In fact in the next few weeks I probably won't get a consecutive amount of sleep adding to more than a couple of hours (I haven't had that in over a month anyway). Again...this is okay...no really I get it, no sleep, it's still okay. I have to sacrifice everything in my life for this child and I'm okay with that. Woman have done it before me and will do it after me, I am capable of doing it and know that. Yes I know the baby is going to cry and yes I know that is going to stress me out when I can't fix it...that's okay...no baby ever died from crying and I'm willing to learn in the moment the way any other parent did it. Crying babies do not scare me...they never really have.

Seeing her face for the first time, hearing her cry, watching her smile and every other amazing thing that is involved in parenting makes every sacrifice worth it. I have waited a long time to have my own child and being aloud to have one with such an amazing husband makes it worth how long I've waited. I don't think I need to be reminded any more what I'm giving up and how my life will change. I've been able to be selfish and live for myself for a bit longer than a lot of parents so I think it's really great timing for Jonathan and I. Life will change...I get it...life will also get so much better because she'll be in it. We'll have this new person that we've created together with us...that makes it worth it.

Life as I now know it will change and I couldn't be happier about it.

Hmm...I suppose that wasn't as much of a rant as I thought it would be...time for me to go eat some food...again...and possibly get a slurpee because I'm hot. :p

...how do you classify it really? Is it when you organize all the clothes you have according to age. Or when you set up everything you have as though the child is actually here? How about vaccuming, daily...lol

Okay so I'm done work...my final countdown before my due date is the arrival of my parents on the 25th....I've been working the countdowns since I found out I was pregnant. Monumental moments throughout the nine months like my parents visit at Christmas, Kai's birth, seeing my sister, finishing work...and one by one they are falling by the wayside so the only thing left is the actual birth of my child.

It's one more day of work and then...the unknown. I don't know if I thought about it that way until just now. I've just been thinking about not having to work and then all of a sudden realized it's not that I'm not working...I'm just doing hourly, paid work any more...lol This is the rest of my life...wow...funny thing...I still can't wait.

I'm very excited to be done work...now don't get me wrong I actually love my job, but my feet have in fact started rebelling BIG time and I just don't think I can stand any more...literally. I have these poofy pudgy feet as well as CANKLES! LoL I can't seem to get over that, it shocks me just slightly to not be able to see the difference between my ankles and my calves...I know that this is part of pregnancy but that doesn't mean I have to like it! LoL

She moves a lot still...in fact I think I can feel when she moves her fingers! I'm getting so anxious to meet this little child it's crazy! Yesterday Jonathan and I went to my grandparents place and we did some laundry. I washed her clothes for the first time and had so much fun folding and looking at the little outfits. Yes I know I will wash SO many of her clothes I'll probably hate it very soon but this first time was a lot of fun! :p

You know what's interesting...people like to look at my belly before my face these days which never bothers me I know I do it too when I see someone who looks like they are 'ready to pop' pregnant. So today I noticed someone I know looking at my belly so I said 'yeah she seems to get bigger every day' to which this woman replied 'I carried twins you don't need to tell me about big'...umm okay I don't recall this being a competition. I'm fairly certain my comment didn't sound competitive so needless to say I was fairly taken aback. I almost felt like saying 'I wasn't competing, just commenting on your obvious gaze at my belly'. I'm sure she didn't mean to be so abrupt...but it shocked me all the same. At the beginning of my pregnancy it was 'just you wait' and now it's 'mine was harder than yours'...for the love people!

The worst right now, even above the cankles, is this stupid cough that will not go away! I don't feel any other 'cold' symptoms just this stupid persisting dry cough that I can't seem to drown in enough water or eat enough Halls...VERY annoying...it makes sleeping quite frustrating because when I lay down...you got it, there goes the coughing. I literally woke myself up coughing last night...it was very annoying. Still is...anyway my wonderful husband is getting my ice cream so I'm gonna go eat that now. 3 1/2 weeks till due date...SO EXCITING! :)